This Wasn't What You've Planned In The First Place
by LittleRedRuby
Summary: On the summer she made a list, a plan, everything turned out to be the opposite, but there was just one thing that she is going to keep doing, just to bear with the heartache.


Character:Quinn Fabray.

Pairing:Faberry (kind of)

Spoilers:To be safe S1 and S2.

Summary:On the summer she made a list, a plan, everything turned out to be the opposite, but there was just one thing that she is going to keep doing, just to bear the heartache.

Author's Note:Just wanted to get in Quinn's head for a little while and this came up, I hope you enjoy it. I don't have a beta so sorry for any mistakes…

Now that you think about it with you head clear it should not be that surprising, hell…, you should have seen it coming, how could you actually think that this absurd plan was going to work in any way?, go back to school like nothing have happened, like all the drama with Be…the baby didn't actually existed in the first place, that it was just your mind playing games at you and everyone in the school, like it wasn't true that every night you would pull out the little picture that a nurse gave you on the hospital the day you had to go to your house, go back and get you spot on the cheerleading squad again, Head Cherrio, lose some weight, waste all your summer on diets and exercise routines that would made Sue Silvester proud of your resistance and optimism for sports.

While you were writing down all of the steps for your plan you were convinced that this would work, while you were doing that you had a playlist with all of the songs that she had sung on glee club that year, as an incentive that, no matter how much you fucked up one year, you could at least redeem yourself for the next one, that you would not give up that easily.

But reality hit you like a slushie directly in the face, it was impossible…, it was absurd, it was just so stupid, you were so naïve, or at least the little part of naivety that was left on you system at that moment gave you hope that you were going to make it.

And then there is everything that happened at prom, like you weren't completely fucked up because the Lucy story had come to light and for everyone to see, like everyone was happy to see you suffer, and the worst part wasn't that everyone found out about that, it was that not even you mother was capable of asking you how you felt about it, since you came back to this house the only thing that was familiar in any way was the smell of whiskey in the air and the morning sickness of an alcohol addict, it was always the same process, you got up to get ready, went to your mother's bedroom to leave two aspirins and a large glass of water, whispering on her ear that you were going to school, and got out as soon as possible that house that should not be called a home.

But even after all of that she was there, interfering with your plans, and it was just so unfair the fact that everything that she asked you would make it without question, the fact that she wanted to wipe out your tears after you slapped her for Christ sake!, the fact that she lend out her hand for you to reach when you were falling apart, and you just wanted to hold it like your life depended on it, and in some way it did, or at least you mental health depended on it.

And the we get back to this moment, alone in your room with the same playlist that you used the last summer, the same songs, with some that she had sung this year, the same list with the absurd plans that you were so convinced were going to work and it's kind of funny actually, the superficiality of what were your thoughts in that moment, but there was something you were going to keep trying to get, and it wasn't the prom queen title or going back to be Head Cherrio, it was the only thing that you deserve from her, the only thing that would made the heartache bearable.

1) Lose the baby weight

2) Get back in the Cherrios (Head Cherrio) _FAILED_

3) Find a boyfriend with status _FAILED_

4) Use said boyfriend for the campaign for Prom Queen _FAILED_

5) Win Prom Queen COMPLETELY FAILED

_**6) Make Rachel Berry hate me.**__Working on it._


End file.
